Ever wondered why you always ball up, and would rather not talk about your sexual tales whenever you hang out with your friends for a little ‘bedroom gossip session’? Or do you try by all means to shut out all those sex episodes during baecation, choosing to rather get sex over and done with than cherish the time of bliss? Yes, sex is regarded by most as one unexplainable and pleasurable moment, but it’s not always fun for all because of the pain some associate it with. If you’re one of those individuals’ who doesn’t really find anything enjoyable about sex, then I bet I’m definitely writing this JUST FOR YOU.
Not always do individuals own up to their partners and confess that in all honesty, the sex being offered on the platter is not enjoyable at all. Having sex might be a really painful encounter if your partner doesn’t understand just how your hormones work. Not everyone is naturally conditioned to get all juicy and wet just after one magic wand spin, so if your bedroom dilemma involves you dreading penetration and sex itself, then here are a few tips to help you terminate all your fears:
Communicate with your partner
Communication is key in the bedroom or that cosy spot you enjoy having your sensual moments, so the first crucial step to improving your intimate moments is by talking about it. You might then try to argue that it’s not easy to just speak out and tell your mate how you prefer your romance done but if you’re ever going to enjoy sex, your partner needs to know your own set of sex-related dos and don’ts. Not everyone enjoys certain sex positions, so why endure that awful Kamasutra position which leaves you in pain and wishing you were sitting in the lounge, watching the newsfeed rather than sprouting on the bed? Hey you: communicate! …because your partner is definitely never going to guess just how you want to have sex.
Get a bit funky around your partner
You might also be dreading sex due to you own rigidity when time to get a bit kinky and wild comes. There’s definitely no need for you to pretend to be a priest or a nun when you’re with bae, so each and every time when you’re together, always get cosy and a bit funky. Have you ever tried having sex in a rose petal and bubble bath-filled tub or even whilst wearing costumes from your favourite movie episode? Who also lied that sex must always be indoors or in the same spot? Always try something fun, be daring and make every sexual episode count because you only live once, so live by your own sex rules.
Relax whenever you’re with your partner
Nothing in life surpasses being relaxed and at home whenever you are around your partner so just remember to relax. Your body, mind and spirit all determine just how good you’ll enjoy sex each time you have it, so just relax. The whole ‘I’m very shy when I’m around bae’ is so 1968 because at the end of the day, sex is a 50/50 bargain. If you short-change yourself in the process, remember not to go around, spoiling the fun for others by telling them that sex is very dull, discoloured and boring because on the contrary, its one unexplainable blessing in disguise handed to mankind by Mother Nature.
So the next time you’re having sex and feel like you’re not lube~d enough, there’s definitely no harm in saying, “Hey honey, I think I need some extra romance and oiling.” Until next time, shelve all those bedroom dilemmas, enjoy sex and DON’T DREAD THE PAIN!
By Miriam C.R. Mushaikwa